I got laid off, now what?

By definition, layoffs are unplanned and feel like a suckerpunch. What do you do now? Here’s a few things you should do before doing anything else. Photo by Christian Erfurt on Unsplash

You try not to freak out that it’s 9pm and your boss texts you that your skip-level manager wants to have an 8am zoom meeting with the two of you. It’s 7am their time. Surely this is no big deal right?

And when you realize HR is on, and the zoom is recorded — you know.

You’ve been laid off.

This is not a post about networking or finding a new job–yet. This is a post about how you can care for yourself in a time of intense, unexpected and frightening transition.

The first things you should do after being laid off

After making sure you have set yourself up with severance or clarified any matters with your termination, TAKE TIME OFF.

Here are some ways to take a little time off before resuming your career

1. Find Your Happy Place

Surround yourself with a few people who love you no matter what (including yourSelf). If possible, somewhere where you feel you absolutely belong, 1000%.

Keys: Be in a place where you are empowered, safe, loved, comfortable.

2. Get Offline

Turn everything electronic off for a while. Days if you can. A week if possible. Just a night if you must, but do it.

Getting some time away from electronics is crucial to your post-layoff recovery. Do it!

Sleep in. Breathe a lot. Move your body. Walk. Play. Do something creative you haven’t done since you were younger.

Listen IN

Write about it. Cry about it. Scream about it. Make a stupid song up about it. Dream a little. Cry some more.

3. Come Back On Your Terms

Now … when you’re ready, (inhale deeply, exhale deeply), reach out to a few trusted colleagues and let them know you’re looking for something new.

4. Curate Your Social Media Exposure

After you come back online, be very careful to avoid most social media.

Set timers for yourself.

Remember that CREATION > consumption. Be very careful about just consuming content. Make sure you are putting things in.

Beware of doomscrolling.

It’s probably a really good idea to avoid the news in apps, tv or online. Fear sells news and gets clicks. You don’t need that in your life. Long-form, well thought out journalism, perhaps, but don’t fall for the sensationalism. You don’t need that in your life.

Avoid the news and social media — its designed to trigger you. You don’t need that right now (or… ever?)

5. Remember Who You Are

Cheesy, I know, and probably reminds you of at least one parental figure in your life, but not losing track of yourself (and not tying your worth to your former job (or any job)) is really important.

You probably wont have an ancestor appear to you in the clouds, but, hey, still a good idea to remember who you are.

You are brave.

You are resilient.

You have been through hard things before, and those made you better.

You will get through this hard thing as well.

And this will make you better.

6. Look for the Helpers

After the Boston Marathon bombing, my wife was touched by stories of the people who selflessly helped each other, not knowing if there were more attacks or if they, themselves, were in danger.

It reminded her of this quote from Mister Rogers that is one of the truest Truths I think there is, and applies especially to you right now:

Look for the helpers

“If you look for the helpers, you’ll know that there’s hope.” – Fred Rogers

All in all, you will find that everyone wants to help you and nobody wants to hold you back or keep you down. You may be tempted to keep this all inside, but telling some trusted friends or parters what you’re going through will really help.

You got this.

Bonus points: Say a silent vow to never be so dismissive to recruiters in the future 😉

Blog Lifehacks Process Improvement Tools and Apps

Missive, How I ❤️ Thee…

💡 Dear Reader: Missive has released a referral program! If you click here I will get a tiny slice of that good, good bread they're handing out if you should subscribe.  This is the only referral link on this page: The rest are just direct links.

This is a love letter.

A love letter to email.

Well, not exactly to email, because you, email, are a necessary evil.

This, is about my email application.


My — unified messaging and communications operating system.

Missive App.

(Disclaimer: No, missive pays me nothing for this. They don’t even have an affiliate program. In fact, I pay them a fairly solid monthly subscription for my growing recruiting team. I will gladly keep paying. And, enjoying the hair I did not pull out of my own head over using plain old email tools)

Story Time

Its about 23 minutes into the zoom meeting and, the other person says, “give me a moment, that’s in my other email account…

“… ugh, I got logged out.

“OK! Sent it.

“Dang. I sent it from the wrong address. That’s not going to work.

:angry email noises:



Meanwhile… the hopefully polite look on my face while I witness this belies the eye twitching that is happening under the surface. Not only could this meeting have likely been an email, 80% of this meeting ended up being about email issues:

  • Not finding the mail
  • Mail in the wrong place
  • Did you get the email?
  • Did they send the email?
  • Not being cc’d on the email or otherwise not knowing the content of said email
  • Getting forwarded the email last-minute and now having to page through mind-numbingly confusing forwards to find the part of the email that matters for this meeting,
  • …all from your phone because your laptop is presenting.
  • Needing to email someone and ask a specific, detailed question
  • Emailing the person again asking them to quickly reply as we’re trying to make a decision
  • Clarifying the question we asked, since, thanks to brevity, we assumed they knew all the context of what was being asked and were forced to reply with “It depends…”
  • and so on
  • and so forth

Email issues that could have been solved if communication, not email, were the priority. ?

If I Haven’t Told You Missive Is Better Than Your Email App, Either We Haven’t Talked, or I am Being Nice

The other half of this story is that people who work with me know that, at this point in the meeting, if I have not yet brought up Missive, the email app I have been leveraging for at least three years now, it is because of an immense amount of personal strength to keep. my. mouth. shut.


Missive is like my right-hand, time-saving, boss-level communications master control center.

Missive is like my own mind, but with a better memory, and with emoji support. ?

I can’t stress enough all the ways that Missive helps me, my personal life, my family and my team through a week and, in building ConnectedWell from a literal company-of-one to a growing team with expanding partnerships and opportunities, Missive has been my most-trusted ally, by my side in that awesome, scalable, helpful-but-not-clingy kind of way we all seek from our email applications, but, sadly, most never find.

OK, Hot Shot. Why is Missive So good?

Here is a list of things my email program does effortlessly that yours doesn’t. Neener, neener.

  • Works effortlessly across any device I have, via app or browser, with zero functionality loss on mobile. Truly a mobile-first application.
  • One Login. I login with my account once and it remembers all my other accounts, gmail, gsuite, exchange, outlook, or whatever other email server you use.
  • Keyboard shortcuts. The gmail ones. Or, use your own
  • SWIPE multiple emails at once. Delete, Archive or Snooze all these junk emails at once and then, boom, inbox zero #FTW.
  • Also remembers all my inbound/outbound signatures, forwarding rules and other tweaks for each account.
  • Good search across all accounts or separate ones
  • Email templates for you or shared
  • SNOOOOOOOoooooze emails for working with later
  • You can even snooze email from the alerts that pop up on your computer or device.
  • Send emails later, as well (so you look like you were (or were not) up at 1:30am)
  • Snooze emails to come back to you after you sent them (so you can follow up). Choose to snooze only if the other person does not reply.
  • UNDO send, too, so you don’t look like this guy when you accidentally reply-to-all (see below, or here: youtube). This one is YUGE.
  • Rules and filters that make gmail rules, uh, not rule and make outlook’s rules feel like 1990s tv sitcom dramas. Cute, but really not that entertaining any more.
    • My personal favorite use of the email rules? I have a set of filters and rules that keep all email OUT of my inbox except for a few very specific times of the day (a la Tim Ferris style) so I can actually get work done.

What Happens When You Reply All

Here are some of the superpowers Missive gives my team and me:

Missive’s integrations beef up my
email superpowers ??
  • Inline email collaboration and editing (and inline sidebar chat) like a Google Doc, but in. email.
    • Let that last one sink in a little
  • Assign people and tasks to an email or just FYI them. Do not forward the email. Just @mention them in the sidebar and they have access. Boom. Instantly, to the whole thread in their screen, along with all chat messaged about it, in chronological order, as if they were the one who got the initial message.
  • Real team shared inboxes, both a general box like “sales@” where everyone gets a copy of messages, or a way to let everyone see the status, and replies of all other messages — so nothing slips through the cracks (and a great way to share know-how and best practices among team members)
  • Send on behalf of the team or as an individual, either all the time or just ad-hoc. For example, you could can ask me for help on an email, we collaborate on it, and then you can send the email AS ME, using my own email credentials, right from your own email app, and zeeeeero tech support or password sharing required.
  • Don’t forward an email to yourself or your trellor board or something. Send them (or your task list/trello board) an actual URL LINK to an exact email so you can click once and go right back into the content you need.
  • Ready to power up? Seamless integrations with apps you’re already using. I use their trello, todoist, pipedrive and other integrations every hour of the day.
  • Social integrations let me manage facebook, instagram and other social messages from my email app. Yeah. That easy.
  • Missive’s powerful Twillio integration powers the chat “bot” telegram like feature on this site (lower right corner), dropping site-based chats into the support@ team inbox as if they are emails. Try it.
  • I could also use Twillio to send SMS messages, too, fwiw.
  • Missive is actively being developed with a very responsive team (I’ve chatted with Etienne, Phillipe and Rafael frequently). Their Canny feature requests, get this, actually turn into product releases. They ship multiple times a month.

I will come back to this and add more, but for now, this is a pretty good list of reasons you should check out Missive.

Again, missive doesn’t pay me, but I gladly pay them. It’s a good app. And, for something you use 38 hours a day, you should treat yourself better than the way you’re being treated.

I’m just sayin.

Of course, how you choose to email is none of my business.

Would you like to reply?